Anyways, let us dive in, shall we? If this year was a massive milestone for me in my personal life, then I find it only fitting to begin with one of the most awe-inspiring figures in the realm of monster-centric cinema.
Reporter Goro Maki is sailing near Daikoku Island, which has recently seen its fair share of volcanic activity. He suddenly comes across a fishing vessel, the Yahata-Maru, and after stopping to explore the boat, sees that nearly every person on board has died. Suddenly, he is attacked by an unusually large sea louse, but is saved by crew member Hiroshi Okumura, who despite suffering wounds from fighting with this mutation, survived his encounter. While Okumura is hospitalized in Tokyo, Maki questions the man about what exactly happened on board. He claims that during a rough storm one evening, he saw a monster emerge from the Island, and that the enlarged copepod which killed his friends must have come off of what startled him so badly. After looking through a series of photographs and hearing stories of a Russian submarine being destroyed by seemingly unknown forces, the fisherman and journalist conclude that something has occurred that the rest of the world prayed would never happen: Godzilla, an immense, walking, breathing reminder of the atomic nightmare, has returned. In a world that features two nations on the verge of waging war with one another, what actions can be taken to halt this unstoppable presence? And for that matter, at what cost?
Despite what you may be thinking right now, I have not seen every single entry in the oh-so-beloved and adored Godzilla film series. Well, not in their intended or original formats anyway. If I can be allowed to cheat right off the bat, my viewing of 1984's The Return of Godzilla was, by definition, not the first time that I partook in such a thing. In fact, if you would be so kind and appreciative, let me rewind the clock for you.
During my childhood, there was a local VHS store in Wheaton, MD whose name I unfortunately can not recall. Though they were eventually bought out and turned into a Blockbuster Video, both establishments (along with THIS previously discussed tape) served as a stomping ground for me being able to catch my first glimpses into the wonderful world of Kaiju Eiga (roughly translated to "giant monster movie"). Over a good number of years, I managed to convince my parents to rent nearly anything and everything starring gigantic creatures battling either a battalion of resistance and/or another beast of equal-sized proportions. One of these efforts was the fairly self-explanatory Godzilla 1985, which happened to be the American edit of the film whose poster and synopsis you glanced at a moment ago. Despite the video cassette copy of the flick opening with an amusing animated short titled Bambi Meets Godzilla (which can be viewed here), I remembered virtually nothing about the actual motion picture itself. Sadly, it appears as though Godzilla 1985 may forever be stuck in the realm of VHS traders and buyers, as legal reasons such as the sampling of scores from Christopher Young (Hellraiser, Drag Me to Hell) and the original stateside distributor (New World Pictures) going the way of the dodo, have prevented it from ever seeing release on a disc of any kind in the West.
Yet in 2016, Kraken Releasing, who have helmed the Blu-Ray releases of several other Toho projects during previous years, somehow managed to scoop up the rights to the original, theatrical cut for The Return of Godzilla. To an unabashed geek such as myself, this was our equivalent to Chinese Democracy finally being released to the general public. Yes, it was depressing to hear that only ONE cut of this forgotten entry would be available for us fans to finally own again, but it was still shockingly exciting news, especially since I have grown and gained a great deal of respect for the original Japanese language audio. So, now that I have finished their decent-looking Blu-Ray of Return, what were my thoughts overall?
If you are going by "giant monster movie" standards, this particular picture doesn't do much to differentiate itself from the rest of the pack. Godzilla attacks buildings, fights tanks and fighter jets, picks up trains and discards them like a toddler who tires of his old toys (which felt like an homage to this film's thirty-year-old predecessor), and breathes his trademark atomic breath on the poor suckers who aren't smart or quick enough to run as far away as possible. Even his origin is just the same as it was in his original heyday, though Return disregards every other entry's existence save for the debut flick from 1954. Hell, the backstory on how Toho Studios tried several times to revive the King of the Monsters during his ten year hiatus from cinema could have made for a far more interesting final product. Some of these included American producer Henry G. Saperstein's idea of pitting the Big G against a variation of one of the titular creatures from Toho cult favorite (and previous Unseen Terror entry) War of the Gargantuas. When that fizzled out, Toho decided to remake the original film, only with Jun Fukuda (Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla, Godzilla vs. Gigan) sitting in the director's chair, rather than the more well-known and respected Ishiro Honda, who opted out of directing this revival due to his commitment on several Akira Kurosawa projects. Finally, it was decided that were the decision made to have Godzilla resurface on the big screen, he would face off with a larger threat, and it would be against a previously unseen force simply called "The Asuka Fortress." Though not much is known beyond that project's title, the image of a gigantic version of the NXT women's champion facing off against a radioactive dinosaur could make for silly fun in this day and age. And yet, when THAT didn't take off, the final idea presented was to have a newer entity, a sort of "combiner" kaiju that went by the name of Bagan, take him on. Suffice to say, none of these ended up going beyond the developmental and pre-production stages, and the latter monstrosity in particular has garnered himself quite a bit of fame over the decades as perhaps the most beloved unused Toho creature of all time, making appearances only in the realm of video games such as Super Godzilla and Godzilla Movie Studio Tour. I mean come on, the poor guy couldn't even make it into a Mothra-centric release!
"CAN ANYBODY FIND ME SOMEBODY TO LO-er, FIGHT?!"
The human cast is unfortunately hit or miss (Keiju Kobayashi as Japan's Prime Minister is arguably Return's best character), and even coming from someone who watches television programs such as The Walking Dead, I felt that I was being smothered by the amount of new people that were inserted into the plot throughout its decently-long running time (and with pro wrestling-style introductory captions popping up during said debuts). The motion picture boasts a rather impressive composition from the relatively unknown Reijiro Koroku, who does an adequate job of filling the legendary Akira Ifukube's shoes for the time being, as the veteran refused to return for a newer entry because he felt dissatisfied by the decision to increase Godzilla's size during his hibernation (a choice that was inevitable due to Tokyo's skyline growing that much larger over the course of ten years), and didn't want to write scores for "eighty-meter monsters." Luckily, the aforementioned replacement manages to conjure up pieces that are equal parts grandiose and quietly morbid. It is one of the more underrated aspects about a release that some will be catching just so they may see the spectacle of it all. And for those who will feel the opposite way about this or are offended by the man's absence: Akira-san returned to the franchise only seven years later. Leave your stupid comment in your pocket.
Some of what makes this particular film shine is also what hurts it in the end. While the overall design of this iteration of Godzilla, the first of the "Heisei" period, doesn't look terrible per se, there are a good number of close-up and "mug" shots that look almost comical. Yes, he looks pretty menacing when viewed from the side, and the decision to add tiny ears and sharper-looking teeth don't really hurt the aesthetic and overall presentation of the kaiju, a decent portion of the criticism stems from Toho's decision to construct a sixteen-foot robotic version of our colossal antagonist in addition to using the tried and true technique of having an actor parade around in a rubber suit (in this case, Gigan actor Kenpachiro Satsuma). Despite it costing nearly half a million dollars, there are times where it often looks and feels far too unrealistic (well, for this type of picture) for the viewer to feel threatened or frightened. Thankfully, the traditional portrayal of the titular creature in The Return of Godzilla makes up for these occasionally odd technical choices by having him act as mean as he possibly can. There are multiple scenes of the radioactive behemoth coming dangerously close to the civilians fleeing or hiding from him, and in several instances, his own path of destruction is demonstrated by scenes of innocents being crushed by rubble or even running around engulfed in flame. The only thing missing was a choir of girls singing out of fear and despair like in the original Gojira, but it's a minor complaint. He is a mean, primal, and occasionally simplistic animal that, simply put, can not be stopped or reasoned with, and by God(zilla), sometimes that is all that we fans need; a walking symbol of the reminders and horrors of nuclear warfare.
The Return of Godzilla does stumble in a few areas, and most of that is due to being a victim of having a smaller budget and the evolution of special effects work throughout the thirty-plus years since its initial release. However, the battles with the military and the spiffy Super X, a self-described "flying fortress" with cadmium missiles and special armor, are other highlights that are fine enough to make you forget about the occasionally confusing amount of human characters. The cold war tension, despite feeling a little dated, is actually handled fairly well and maturely as well, although I wish they had hired somebody without Grade Z-level acting to play the representative for the United States during his two moments on screen. It is certainly flawed, but even the weaker entries in this sixty-two yearlong franchise have a handful of good parts to them (yes, even Godzilla's Revenge). If you're a fan that ranges from "casual" to "obsessive," then I can't see a reason why you shouldn't finally add this one to your own personal collection. For the time being, The Return of Godzilla can be purchased via most online shopping services, and during the time that you are reading this, there is a strong chance that you can grab it for a meager ten dollars on Amazon like I did.
Or, you can grab several dozen hardcover books to read while you wait for 1985 to finally be released. Your loss.
Tomorrow, those darn monsters are sticking around and still causing trouble for the general populace, but this time, they're invading North Korea...
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