Yep, three years after it's release and surprising box office intake, I finally gave into the hype and checked out Paranormal Activity. I will have to preface this review by saying it's probably going to contain a little less eloquence and a little more hostility.
The film's plot follows a young couple named Micah and Katie, who have moved into a new home in a suburban neighborhood. But over time (and through Micah's video camera), we see that the house may be haunted.
Alrighty, I'll get my one positive thing to say out of the way: I give the film props for making so much money solely based on word of mouth. It's rare for a horror film to rake in this much at the box office these days, especially through those means. The last time I can remember that happening was with The Blair Witch Project, but I'll get to that later.
But as I mentioned above, that's the only good thing I can say about the film. 60% of this film bored me to death, 39% of it annoyed me beyond belief, and the other 1% was somewhat remotely interesting. The film feels like a lot of nothing, coated with annoying characters, bad acting, and finally topped off with a final act that starts off good, but quickly plummets in the last scene (I'm sure there were quite a few people who said "you've gotta be fucking kidding me"). I will admit though, horror movies based around ghosts or spirits, minus Poltergeist and The Exorcist, don't really do anything for me.
But still, this just felt like a waste of time, and for that matter, an unoriginal waste of time. If you've seen previous "found footage" films like The Blair Witch Project or [REC], there's really no point in watching this. There were times where it felt like it was turning into a 90 minute version of the show Ghost Hunters, complete with a myriad of "Did you see that? What was that?!"s. The film does try at one point to implement the idea that maybe it's Katie who is haunted, and not the house, but by that point, I was so disinterested in the film (and her annoying c**t of a character) that I didn't give a shit whatsoever.
I just didn't like this film at all. I felt more nervous and involved watching The Reef than I did this, and I didn't like that film that much either. And I know there are some who might want to ask me "why did you even bother if you don't like ghost movies?" Well, as a horror fan, I always welcome the opportunity to try and scare me or reel me in with something that doesn't normally do so. I was creeped out by Buried, despite not being claustrophobic. Heck, even as a kid, Arachnophobia scared the hell out me, and that was during a time when I was fascinated with insects of all sorts. Of course, watching the latter film as I'm older, I realize it's mostly a comedy, but that's beside the point :P. I didn't feel scared, or even remotely nervous here. Also, I ask kindly, to those who were actually scared by this film, please...go watch more horror movies. I'm willing to believe that real, serious horror fans probably had the same problems with this that I had. Heck, I'm sure that once you do watch more, you'll recognize this to be the silly, dumb, slow, mess that it is. Bleh.
Tomorrow, I'm hoping to wash the taste of that terrible film out of my mouth with...Nazi zombies?!
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